Friday, December 24, 2010
December 25, 2010 12:41 AM - Hours before the Violet Hour - The Beginning
I am part of the hushed expectancy. Some in the world celebrate the birth of something extraordinary tonight – and a new way of relating to the world and to others. Others hope for a better dawning in 2011. I am thinking of Luca tonight, one of the main characters in my new novel, The Violet Hour. I am thinking about how love can transform us, and by steps, the world. Some called Luca angel, others genius, but he was also a man as well as a supernatural creature known as a Vampayre..
Luca came to me when I was reading New Moon.
As I read Myers's novel, I thought that the author's brilliance lay in her vision to create characters with supernatural abilities who could choose their families and live on their own terms. What a welcome respite from the jealousies, tensions, and fear that dominated my young life. I would have loved to have been part of a fearless, loyal family; brilliantly courageous and forever young.
The Cullens recognized that Bella was an unusual young woman, though she was accident prone, shy and content to live within her silences and disappointments. Then one day she met a vampire, but also a man, who recognized in her something that the world couldn't see. That's what I longed for when I was younger. Still do. Paradoxically the absence of that in my lfe convinced me that it existed.
I was born into a family where I lived as stranger and searched for the lost parts of myself in strangers' eyes. I longed for that spark of recognition that said "You are one of mine. Welcome back. Come home."
For me, that was the evergreen allure of the Twilight series, that and the thought that I could connect with another soul who "knew" me, and who saw my courage and beauty even when I had trouble getting out of bed. I believed that it existed, and that very belief was my proof. Why did i have this certainty in my heart that something else was possible when all that I'd experienced was the shadow side of love - abandonment, bad choices and disappointment? But there it was. My head began to fill with musical sounds that mesmerized me as I struggled to decipher their meaning.
Then the characters started to speak to me that night as I pondered the possibility of unlimited possibilities and the courage to embrace them. I literally saw the top of my head open and yellow file folders started downloading. I began to hear my characters' voices and as they became louder and more insistent, I began to listen to them as I hadn't listened to myself - with attention and respect.
I didn't approach them as a writer but as a student. I'd allowed them to tell me their stories, conflicts, pain and hope. I learned a lot from them as I tried to faithfully chronicle their tales. It felt as though they were speaking through me and I simply entered their data faithfully.
Have I told their story well. You will decide for yourself. All that I know is that there is more to heaven and earth than we could ever imagine. And that when we remain open and willing to step beyond our comfort zone, we will be shocked and thrilled at what awaits us, at what has been trying to get our attention. I was ready to listen. Now it's your turn. Do you believe that supernaturals walk among us?