Saint or sinner? Visionary or madman? Gift or burden? I say saint, visionary and gift to the experiences that I've had with my mom since she died. I prefer to say transitioned for it doesn't bite with the final sting of death. Transitioning implies continuation. Death connotes the end. I don't believe that love ends. Nor do I feel that the energy, love and spirit of the deceased person ceases to exist.
I've had many experiences with my mother since she left. I had told her that I would meet her every night through Reiki, just as I had done when she was alive and laying half paralyzed in a nursing home bed. How can I explain the relief, joy and utter freedom that she communicated on the day that she traveled to other heavens? She had sent me a message and shared that message with other healer friends. She wanted me to know that she was joyous and free. And then there was the Reiki. As I lay wrapped in the pearl crocheted blanket that covered her during her final phase, I felt the Reiki energy leap like fire in my hands. The energy laughed and played as we once did together. It moved and danced with my mother's gentle grace. I felt the energy more powerfully than when she lay comatose, straddling disparate realities. I heard her lyrical laughter, and felt her loving presence. She was more real to me than the flesh that had lain crippled and twisted in the hospital bed. There has been a living presence to her energy that had been dampened and distant while she yet lived.
She told me that my precious cat who had been diagnosed with cancer the same time that she suffered her last and most severe stroke, would be healed. Mom said that she had to go but that he would be healed as a gift. She spoke of her devotion to myself and my sisters and said that our time would not be long on this earth, relatively speaking. She said that it was her choice to remain close until we once again embraced each other and laughed with abandon. I was humbled and gratified when she said that I shouldn't presume that our work was finished because she no longer walked the earth. She said that we yet had spiritual work to do and that our love was real and constant.
These are my experiences which can be denied or refuted. But they are my truth. Just as she is my light. As we approach Mother's Day, I honor the dignity, love and gratitude that characterized her last years. I honor the mother goddess energy that resides in each of us whether we have nurtured babies in our wombs or our hearts. I am humbled by the divine and universal mother energy. Some call her Virgin Mary, Guru Amma, the Indian "hugging saint", some call her mother earth. I call her blessed and call out Hail Mary (my mother's name) in the middle of the night, certain that she can hear me with an acuity that surpasses human hearing. I know that she can sense me with a precision that surpasses human touch. I know that she can love me with a purity that transcends earthly imperfections.
So join me in saying Hail Mother to all of the mother's we've had whether friend, teacher, lover, pet, or God. Someone has nurtured us at one time or another or we would surely have died.
Blessed be every mother on this Mother's Day