I'd grown complacent in my spiritual practice and hadn't maintained the vigilance that was prudent for a supernatural, such as I. Even though I was half man - half angel, I'd forgotten the fires in which my supernatural form had been forged and became involved with the world. I was a brilliant young composer at Juilliard. It's not necessary for me to feign a false sense of humility. I'd had five hundred years to perfect my craft. Nothing less than brilliance was acceptable. But my spiritual practice hadn't developed with the same velocity. I'd been celibate for the last three hundred years for I knew that intimacy would bring me to the brink of murder. And I could no longer tolerate that. I'd learned to survive by other means from Indian monks with whom I'd studied for two hundred years.
But my human longing had been awakened with her sound. It snaked through my mind, my very veins with a sensuality that made me remember too much. And the remembering awakened my longing and in turn my desire. I had to be near her. Even though I hadn't met her yet.
When she came to Juilliard to audition, every sense, every cell was acutely attuned to her being. And I wanted to seek her out, even as I knew that I couldn't dare to engage with her. But I was again misguided for my inattention left her prey to the one creature whom I hated above all else. He understood her talent and how he could use it to escalate our centuries old feud. Phisto had also calculated how he could manipulate her talent to increase his fame.
So my effort to protect her had endangered her. And I would do anything to protect her from one such as he, a Vampire. Anything.